


How I fell in love.

by Frnk



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Artist Gerard Way, Body Dysphoria, Boys Kissing, College, First Kiss, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Growing Up Together, Hormones, I Tried, Idiots in Love, M/M, Medical Inaccuracies, Novel, Romance, Story within a Story, Time Skips, Trans Character, Trans Frank Iero, Virgin Frank Iero
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 04:04:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16318814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Frnk/pseuds/Frnk
Summary: The first time Gerard ever punched another boy was in his second year at High School. His name was Greg, a tall, lanky boy who was towering over a younger boy.Please read notes!





	How I fell in love.

**Author's Note:**

> While writing this, I really tried to do a lot of research on the transgender FTM aspect, not everything is accurate but I hope it helps someone feel a little bit more valid. The ups and downs of transitioning.

_The first time Gerard ever punched another boy was in his second year at High School. His name was Greg, a tall, lanky boy who was towering over a younger boy. He can even remember the insults Greg threw at him._

_"Little Franchesca needs her momma. So cute. Just admit it, dyke!" As soon as Gerard caught the transgender badge on the boys backpack, he lost it, planting his fist right in Gregs stomach. It probably hurt Gerard more than him, but it winded him enough to let Gerard grab the boys arm and get the fuck out of there. And that was the day he met his bestfriend, Frank Iero._

-

Thinking back on it now was hilarious, mainly because Frank could bench 200 lbs over his head and got into (and won) more fist fights than Gerard ever seen. Frank was lying on Gerards bed, even though his own room across the hall was perfectly okay, hair ruffled and a sleepy smile on his face as Gerard tried to do his project.

"You're distracting."

"Haven't fucking said a thing, dickbag." Frank chuckled, voice cracking softly. It still surprised Gerard how deep it was now. Gerard flipped him off and moved over to lay on the bed, turning onto his side to see Frank type on his phone. His fingers moved quickly, not giving Gerard enough time to read the story.

"Frankie."

"I'll send you it when it's done. Shh." 

"But-" Frank shushed him softly and saved the draft before turning to face Gerard.

"I need a lift over to College tomorrow, okay?"

"Actually going in? Crazy." Gerard snorted, watching Frank flip him off.

"I'm going to the gym. Do you want to come?"

"Not today. Sleepy." Gerard rolled onto his belly and shivered at the hand rubbing his back gently. Frank didn't leave until Gerard was snoring into the pillow.

-

Gerard liked to watch Frank work out. Was it weird going to the gym just to sit on a bench and watch Franks muscles move? Probably. Atleast the college gym was empty and Gerard could curl up into his sketchbook. 

"I handed in my story, saved you a copy in my bag." Frank grunted and dropped the weight onto the ground gently. 

"Will you read it to me?"

"Yeah." Frank mumbled as he pushed Gerard gently.

"My bench." Gerard moved to the floor, watching Frank adjust the weights before lying on his back and tightening his grip on the bar.

"Cover me?"

"You think I can lift that? I can scream pretty loud though. It's all good." He grinned at Franks laugh before grunting as his lifted it. Gerard could watch him for hours. 

-

And then a phone call was all it took to break Gerards heart into a million pieces. 

"Gerard Way? This is St. Annes hospital."

"Um...thats me. Is everything okay?"

"You are listed as the emergency contact for Franchesca Iero-"

"Is he okay?"

"They've been admitted. Can you come?-"

Gerard hung up and ran out of the building, heart pounding in his chest as he forced himself to unlock the car. He honestly didn't know how he didn't get a ticket as he parked at the hospital, heart still pounding as he tried not to break down. 

Then he ran into Franks room to find him flirting with a nurse.

"You son of a bitch!" Gerard groaned as he collapsed into a chair. Sure Frank had a broken arm and a banadged head from whatever the fuck he was doing, but he was  _alive_ and  _still making girls blush._  

"Are you crying?"

"I thought you were dead!" Gerard whined as Frank held out his good hand, squeezing Gerards fingers.

"What the fuck happened?"

"Got into a fight. More like three guys jumped me. I'm good though, Gee. Aw Gee, c'mon." Frank whispered when Gerard finally gave into his emotions. He gripped on tighter to Franks hand and sobbed into the sheets. He let Frank tug him up until Gerard could sob into the hospital gown instead.

-

"Are you okay? Need anything?"

"I still got my legs, dickbag." Frank giggled and buried his head into the pillow. Gerard resisted the urge to climb in next to him.

"Seriously though, sore head?"

"I'm good. I'm tired." Frank whisperes softly, turning over to look at Gerard. It was obvious he hadn't slept since the phone call, even if that was three days ago. All he could think about was  _loosing Frank._

"Get into bed, Gee. C'mon, you're gonna pass out."

"But-"

"But nothing." Frank mumbled and shuffled over, making Gerard kick off his boots and climb in. Frank curled up towards Gerards chest, resting his head against Gerards shoulder.

"I'm not going anywhere, G."

"I could have lost you." Gerard admitted, feeling Franks hand sneak up his top to rub his hip.

"But you didn't." Frank whispered and glanced up at him, Gerard felt the tears cloud his vision, biting his lip to force himself not to cry.

"But I could have." His voice shook as Frank stared at him before a hand moved to his jaw, finger tips brushing lightly before they moved to push Gerards hair out of his face. He leaned into it, closing his eyes as he tried to stop acting like a pansy. 

"Gerard?" He blinked his eyes open to see Frank staring at his lips before meeting his eyes. 

"I'm here, okay? I'm fine." Gerard wanted to object, his brain screaming  _but you might not have been_ but then Frank was moving closer, resting his head against Gerards as he stared at his lips. Gerard felt his heart pound again, was Frank going to kiss him? After all these years of hiding the truth? It felt like slow motion as Frank tilted his head, pausing right before their lips met. Gerard couldn't help closing the distance, feeling Franks chapped lips against his own and melting into the feeling. The kiss was slow, dry lips catching on the others as a thumb stroked right below Gerards eye. Frank broke apart first, tear stained eyes matching Gerards.

"I'm here, okay? I'm fine." His voice cracked softly. Gerard shushed him with another press of the lips before pulling Frank closer, holding onto him a little tighter as the cast pressed against Gerards chest.

-

Gerard woke up to Frank typing on Gerards laptop, hand moving quickly as he kept his eyes on the screen. It was pretty cool to watch Frank write, his face flicking over emotions as the words appeared infront of him. 

"What are you writing?" Frank yelped, glancing over at Gerard before rubbing his face. He looked exausted.

"Did you sleep at all?"

"A little. I got a new story Idea." Frank whispered, turning back to type. Gerard didn't bother trying to read it, judging by Franks reaction it was personal. He waved his hand towards the shower and left the room, still hearing the quiet clicks of the keyboard. He spent a long time in the shower, curled up into the bath tub as the water ran over him. He felt emotionally tired, like his brain had been kicked into over drive. 

"Can we talk?" 

Gerard glanced at the blue shower curtain infront of him as he heard the toilet lid close. He hummed and closed his eyes again, waiting for him to continue.

"We kissed." 

"We did." Gerard admitted, nodding to himself. He kept the curtain closed, to lazy to open it. 

"Um..I write romance. I don't do it."

"I know." Gerard did know. Frank was a massive flirt, but never dated, mainly to absorbed in his writing to even think about it. Its mainly why Gerard never admitted his feelings. 

"I shouldn't have kissed you." It hurt Gerard to hear, heart aching as he squeezed his eyes shut. He hummed, mainly to get Frank to fuck off so he could cry. 

"You..you are taking this wrong. I shouldn't have kissed you, not like that. I'm a romance writer, Gee."

"Romance is whatever you make it. Wasn't it you that told me that?"

"When you blew Bert in an alley?" Frank snorted at the memory. Gerard flipped him off through the gap in the curtain. 

"I don't know how to do this. Any of this. The storys are pretend! I haven't a clue how this works in real life. But um..I'd like to give it a try. If you would." Frank mumbled softly. Gerard pushed open the curtain, watching Frank stare at his lap as he puck a loose thread.

"Yes."

"Um..cool?" Frank mumbled before heading out the bathroom door, not even glancing back at Gerard. He bit back his grin at how fucking awkward the  _romance writer_  was. When Gerard eventually wondered out of the bathroom in week old pyjamas, Frank was typing on the laptop, fingers on his broken arm itching to write.

"Why don't you just record your voice?"

"Then i'd have to listen to my voice." Frank snorted and shook his head before biting his lip.

"I..it's based on us. I emailed my mentor the first draft this morning, and she really thinks it could go somewhere? Like published? But I need you to okay it."

"Frank..are you including everything?"

"Most." Frank nodded and chewed his lip, looking at Gerard with hopeful eyes. He'd be a monster to say no.

"Can I read it?"

"Yeah. When I finish it. I'll give it to you before anyone, okay?"

"Okay."

-

Dating Frank was the complete opposite to his storys. Well, its been a week but Gerard could already tell. The work he's read of Frank always included a lot of kisses and a shitton of sex, and yeah he knew they were early on in their relationship, but  _Frank hadn't kissed him again._ He even got nervous the only time Gerard had pecked his lips, spluttering out an excuse to leave the room. Gerard had to admit it kinda hurt. Even now, with Franks head in his lap, he had a laptop balanced on his knees as he typed. Gerard understood why he didn't date, he was so much more confident on paper. 

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Need me to move? I know you've a project due."

"No." Gerard whispered and stroked Franks hair gently, watching the words appear on screen. He couldn't focus on it though. 

"You are into me, right?"

"Litreally writing our love story as we speak, dude." Frank chuckled and saved the draft before shutting the lid closed.

"I'm gonna grab a beer, want one?"

"This is what I mean! Anytime I bring up us, you bolt." Gerard whined as Frank sat up. Frank deflated at looked at him, frowning as he took Gerards hand.

"I honestly don't mean to. I promise." Frank whispered and looked at their fingers, watching Gerards twitch in his hand. 

"I'm not going to be like my writing. I can't be that person."

"I don't want that. I just want you."

"I'm trying, Gee!"

"I'm not mad. Don't shout." Gerard whispered and pulled his legs against his chest. He could feel Frank stare at him when he rested his forehead against them.

"I just..you've no idea what its like Gee. I don't want to kiss you incase it leads to other stuff and i've no idea how you'd react to my body. I can't give you what you need."

"Thats dumb. I never cared that you're trans. Ever. And you aren't there yet, i'm not looking to bone! Just a little kissing would be cool, okay?"

"Okay." Frank mumbled and leaned back into Gerard, who moved until he could hold Franks back against his chest. He kissed his shoulder and held his waist tightly.

"I didn't mean to start anything. I'm sorry."

"It all needed to be said." Frank mumbled quitely, he turned his head to meet Gerards eyes and sighed quietly.

"I'm not sure when i'll be ready to uh-"

"I don't care. Honestly, Frankie." Gerard admitted, grinning when Frank pecked his lips gently. 

"I'm already half way through my book."

"Oh yeah? What are you gonna write the ending as?" 

"I have a few ways." Frank admitted and leaned forward, catching Gerards lips between his own. The position was awkward as fuck but like hell Gerard was going to complain, kissing back happily until Frank broke apart.

"I just need a push sometimes. Okay?"

"Okay." Gerard echoed and let Frank snag the laptop. He closed his eyes and listened to the soft taps of the keys.

-

"Oh..hey." Gerard set down his backpack, glancing away from the needle pressing into Franks belly.

"Sorry. Thought I'd get it done before you were home." Frank mumbled, holding the cotton wool against the wound as Linda broke the needles into pieces and put them in the special bin. 

"S'all good." Gerard waved him off, letting himself stare at Franks hand against tattooed skin, the trail of hair going from Franks bellybutton gave him goosebumps. 

"Feeling okay honey?"

"All good." Frank nodded and let his t-shirt fall into place. Linda tapped the cast and glared at Gerard.

"Did he really need cartoons on it?"

"He asked! Did you blame me?" Gerard whined as Frank nodded happily.

"I did. Take the blame, Gee. Ah, Mikey phoned? Said you were ignoring his calls and he'll be over soon." Gerard waved his hand, throwing himself over the armchair and pushing up his hood. He wasn't ignoring Mikey, not really, he just didn't know if Frank was cool with telling people and he couldn't lie to Mikey.

"Frankie?"

"Hmm?" Frank leaned over the back of the chair, looking down at Gerard.

"Are we uh..telling people?"

"If not, I don't know how to wipe my moms memory. Sorry 'bout that." Frank winked and dissappeared into the kitchen. Gerard stayed on the chair, listening to the faint sounds of voices until Mikey appeared behind him.

"Fuckin' scared me."

"Did you get arrested? Spend all your money on a man of the night? Why the fucks Franks arm broken? Why the fuck are you ignoring my calls?"

"Oh, you got a prositute and didn't share? Lame, G." Frank frowned as he lay on the couch. 

"Bye Linda!"

"Bye honey! Keep my boy safe!" Linda called before the door shut. 

"Nice. Now Linda thinks I buy hookers."

"Can't believe you didn't share." Frank mumbled as he started typing again. Gerard was to busy looking to notice Mikey slapping his head.

"Ow!"

"You only ignore me when you don't want to tell me something. Spit it out!" 

"We're together!" Gerard held up his hands as Mikey raised his again. 

"Who?"

"Frank and I! Put down your fuckin' hand!"

Mikey turned to Frank, who was to busy typing to notice the slap on his head. Gerard had to laugh. 

"I've been talking to you a few times!" 

-

Gerard tried to remember why he usually refused wine, but all he could focus on was his mind swimming and Franks weight against his side. He could faintly register the clicking of laptops keys but he knew Frank was just as drunk, if not worse off than he was.

"What're you writing? Where'd Mikey go?"

"He passed out in my bed." Frank slurred and shifted when Gerard moved, trying to focus on the words blurring infront of his eyes. He could make out  _a strong hand wrapped around his throat_ before his brain caught up with it. 

"Are you writing porn? And you're just sitting normally?!"

"Well..yeah. you want me to hump the cushion?" Frank took a sip of his wine before focusing back on his laptop.

"Are you writing porn about us?!"

"Um..I wanted to write smut? I mean I guess its us. I've been kinda focusing on-"

"Gimmie." Gerard snagged the laptop onto his lap, ignoring Franks whine as he scrolled to the top.

_He trailed his lips down Gs neck, lips catching on his nipple as he begged for more. He liked to hear him beg, slowly moving down the bed until he could trail his teeth against the soft flesh of G's thigh._

"Holy fucking shit. Its porn. It's our fake porn! Oh my god!" Gerard spluttered, pulling his knees to his chest as he read on.

_He listened to the soft whimpers above him, taking his time to trail teeth over the pale skin, leaving teethmarks in its wake as he tugged down the material, mouth watering as soon as he seen the swollen cock infront of him, leaking and wet. He blew on it, watching his body twitch beneath him before glancing up at him, G's eyes wide and begging as he pulled against the restraints around his wrists._

_"Please. I'll do anything. Please!"_

_He believed him in that moment, placing a gentle bite onto his stomach as he ran his finger tips up the shaft, feeling the blood pulse beneath them. He gave in, wrapping a fist around his length and smirking at the howl._

_"What do you want, baby?"_

_"I want you. Anything you'll give me."_

_He felt something tug inside his chest, anything? What would G do if a strong hand wrapped around his throat? What if he tightened his grip onto the brink of passing out? Would G beg for more? He bet he would._

"Holy fucking shit."

"Can i've it back now? I feel like I was caught writing Frank Way in my notebook." Frank snorted and stole the laptop back. Gerard let it go automatically, to distracted by the raging boner in his jeans and the  _porn his boyfriend wrote._

"um..are you creeped out? It's not gonna get shown or even saved, I just felt like-"

"So not freaked out. Is that what you're like in bed?" Gerard tugged his legs up higher, ignoring the ache in his crotch as Frank shrugged.

"I dunno. Its what turns me on? So I think?" 

"Holy fucking shit." Gerard mumbled, telling his body to stay sitting on the couch and ignore the urge to push Frank onto his back. It didn't work, he was moving before he could stop himself, the laptop abandoned onto the floor as Frank met his lips half way. He knew not to push it, instead he kneeled between Franks legs and enjoyed the fell of lips against his own, almost whimpering as Frank licked at his lip for the first time. He opened up, moaning at the touch of tongue against his as Frank wrapped his good arm around Gerards back. He didn't want to pull away but he  _haaad_ to, breaking apart slowly to pant into Franks jaw.

"Finish it? Tell me what you'd write?"

"I'd focus on you Gee, trailing my tongue over your stomach until you'd thrust up, tease the fuck outta you before I finally wrap my lips around your cock, i'd hold your hips down and take it real slow, licking as I went until finally could suck you down. I'd let you thrust into my mouth cause you're so fucking good for me, aren't you Gee? I'd just use my mouth on you, waiting until you came undone and spill down my throat. Wouldn't waste a drop." Frank mumbled quietly, fingers gripping omto Gerards bicep tightly. Gerard felt like he was going to expload. 

"Then i'd stretch you open for me, make you shake against the sheets and make you beg to finally feel me, but it wouldn't be that easy. You'd have to work for it, have to push yourself down onto my cock. Then, when you're finally all full up, I'd make you do all the work as I watch you struggle against the cuffs. I'd reach up to your pretty throat and wrap my hand around it, tightening my grip until bruises bloom the pale skin. I wouldn't let go until you came all over your stomach, then i'd feed it all back to you. Make sure you get what you deserve." Gerard whimpered into Franks jaw, unable to resist the urge to palm himself until Frank gripped his wrist tightly, pulling his hand away and leaving Gerard to sob.

"Please."

"I wouldn't stop until you're clean, then i'd stroke you again, oversensitive and begging me to stop. I'd get you hard again and then i'd ride you, make you beg to touch me. I'd just make you watch until you came apart, filling me up. You know you have to clean up the mess you made, don't you Gee?"

"Frankie, please. I'll do anything."

"I'd sit on your face until every last drop was clean-" 

Gerard thrust against Frank thigh twice before he was emptying into his jeans with a broken moan. Frank kissed his temple and let go of his hand, letting him palm himself through it before he collapsed beside Frank, careful not to touch his arm as he latched on and tried to catch his breath.

"You're so fucking hot." 

"Hmm." Frank hummed sleepily and pulled the blanket off the back of the couch, fixing it over them. 

"Close your eyes? I need to get off-"

"Can I?"

Frank kissed him deeply, ignoring the question as Gerard felt his hand move into his pants. He wanted to object,  _he wanted to do it_ but all he could focus on was Franks tongue against his until he felt the movement and Franks kisses became panting breaths.

"You..are you jacking it?"

"Hmph." Frank covered his eyes with his bandaged arm, ignoring Gerards confused look before Gerard slid his hand onto Franks stomach, waiting for permission. He got it in the form of Franks hand covering his and moving it past the waistband. The moment his finger tips brushed a cock instead of a clit, he wanted to yank his hand out in confusion,  _Frank was trans! He was preop!_ but then Frank whined and thrust against his fingers. Gerard adjusted his position, wrapping three fingers around Franks member and started stroking gently, letting himself move to kiss him deeply. It didn't take long until Frank was whimpering into his mouth, body shaking ad Gerard stroked him through it. Any questions Gerard had were abandoned as soon as Frank curled into his chest. Gerard woke up alone on the couch, but Frank and Mikey were on the floor, sitting against the table as they played video games. Gerard remembers now why he doesn't drink wine, he's  _dying._

"Food?"

"Morning." Mikey grunted, Frank didn't even glance at him. 

"What?" He mouthed to Mikey who shrugged, when Frank went into the kitchen, Gerard got up and remembered last night all at once by the uncomfortable feeling in his jeans. 

"You okay, Frankie?"

"No! I'm awkward and blushing and I've no idea how to look you in the eye!" Gerard laughed as he tugged Franks shoulders until he turned to face him. He grinned as he tugged the hand down from Franks eyes and finally got to see him blush.  

"You are adorable." Gerard admitted, leaning down to peck Franks lips lightly.

"It's okay we did that, right?"

"Yeah." 

"Awesome. I have to shower, tell Mikey I need breakfast as soon as possible." Gerard kissed his forehead and felt Frank nod against his lips.

-

Gerard didn't know how to ask, he didn't know how to  _phrase_ it. It had been two weeks since the night on the couch and Gerard just wanted to know  _how._ He gave up when Frank came in the door from his run covered in sweat, the front of his t-shirt clinging to his skin beautifully as he chugged water. 

"You have a dick." Frank started coughing, sending water all over the floor. He waved his hand when Gerard got up to help.

"I'm okay! Just..random. jesus." Frank cleared his throat and grabbed his laptop, sticking out his tongue at Gerards frown.

"I hate talking about my gender. You know that! I'll google it and leave okay?"

"Okay." Gerard whispered and watched Frank type before holding it out.

"I'm going to shower. Can we please not talk about whats down my pants after?" Gerard nodded as he took it, pulling it into his lap as the words caught his eyes.

_Side effects of testostorone._

He found out a hell of a lot. He found out that Frank had a low chance of concieving a baby naturally and a high chance of weight gain. He found out Frank was at risk for high blood pressure and a high red blood cell count. He also found out the clit enlarges so technically Frank didn't have a dick, he also found it intresting as hell that testostorone could increase height and decrease breast tissue. He was still reading when Frank appeared behind him and kissed his neck softly.

"Its so intresting, Frankie."

"I know. I've been on it for like 5 years now? I'm not going to change much more." Frank kissed his neck lightly again.

"Why don't you put that away Gee? Maybe I could show you what you want to know." Frank whispered softly, Gerard wasted to time in slamming the laptop shut and pulling Frank over the couch, who laughed loudly and met his lips half way.

-

Gerard missed the gym. He was so fucking glad Frank had his cast of now, leaving him to watch the muscles in his back move. The gym was pretty busy today, but Frank had shushed him and pushed him towards the bench to let him watch. It was pretty cool Frank didn't care he was dating a creep. 

"Arm okay?"

Frank grunted in response, eyes catching Gerards in the mirror as he grinned. He was already covered in sweat and looked happy as fuck about it. Gerard glanced away to look around, feeling eyes on him as he caught another man staring, face red in anger. He wouldn't stop either, not even when Gerard grabbed his sketchpad and wanted to bolt.

"What? G?" 

"He's mad."

"Gerard, you belong here. You have a membership just like the rest of us. Sit down. Draw." Gerard looked over at the man and felt his heart freeze. He was coming over, tall and angry. Gerard grabbed Franks hand, more out of fear to the man than to them. He knew Frank could take him.

"Can't be fucking faggots somewhere else?"

"Nah. We like it here." Frank growled, sending shivers up Gerards spine. He knew Frank had anger problems ever since he started the injections and he knew that voice. Gerard had been on the recieving end once and had to kiss Franks ass for a week until he would look at him again.

"He's clearly never worked out in his life-"

"Excuse me?"

"He's fat-" Gerard yelped when Frank hit him, barely able to keep himself standing from the swing of it. Gerard grabbed Franks gym bag and his wrist, dragging him out the back door.

"You didn't need to do that!" 

Frank growled, it wasn't at him and deep down Gerard knew that, but Frank was backing him into the wall and sending goosebumps up his body.

"Frankie? You're kinda scaring me." 

"I wouldn't hurt you. Much." Frank mumbled before he kissed him, licking into Gerards mouth as soon as he could. Gerard let him, didn't even object when the thumb brushed his throat. He sucked in a shakey breath, whimpering as the hand settled on his neck before squeezing. Gerard pushed into it, letting Frank break the kiss to stare at his hand before back up to Gerards eyes.

"So pretty baby." Frank kissed his jaw before he dropped to his knees. Gerard stared down at him, wondering if this was really how Frank wanted to suck his first dick.

"Here? Now?"

"Yup." Frank mumbled as he undid Gerards jeans, keeping them up around his hips as he pushed his nose against Gerards crotch and moaned. As soon the air hit Gerards cock, he whimpered and arched towards Franks mouth, sobbing as Frank bit his stomach.

"Please. Please Frankie." 

Frank wrapped his fingers around his length and looked up at Gerard at the first stroke. His legs almost gave out at the pleasure shooting up his spine as Frank trailed his tongue around the head.

"Holy shit. I'm not gonna last." Gerard warned when Frank finally sunk down slightly, trailing his tongue against the vein and moaning at the taste. Gerard fisted his hair, bucking up towards his mouth and whimpering at the pleasure. Frank tugged his thighs forward, giving him the go-ahead to start thrusting slowly. He could already feel the orgasm building in his stomach as he watched Frank choke and gag around him. He tugged him up by the hair, watching the spit string from his lips as Gerards orgasm hit, Franks hand automatically wrapping around his length until he could milk him through it. His legs gave out, sending him collapsing onto the ground. He didn't really care, letting the aftermath rock through his body as Frank buttoned his jeans.

"Oh."

"Hmm?"

"Camera like right above us." Frank snorted as Gerard looked up. When he slowed his heart down again, he focused on Frank wiping his face on his towel.

"Can we do that every day?"

"Sure." Frank laughed and pushed himself up, nodding towards the gym.

"Heading back in. You coming?"

"Can't I repay the favour?" Gerard pouted. He liked exploring Franks body.

"Nah. Not here, babe. Coming?"

"Gonna head home. Project due." Gerard pushed himself up, laughing as his legs began to shake and Frank supported his weight for him.

"No fighting."

"I'm calm, don't worry." Frank promised and kissed him once.

"Let ma in!" He called over his shoulder before the door shut, leaving Gerard to try and walk home alone.

-

He let Linda in and excused himself, his project was already way to far behind to leave it. When he eventually wondered out of his room in search of a cigarette, he found Frank sobbing into his knees as Linda stroked his hair.

"What?"

"He needs a new prescription. Can't fit him in for a month." Linda whispered, leaving Gerard confused. Okay, he knew Franks injections were important but-

"I'll get my period. My body will react to loosing the hormone and it will undo some of my progress." Frank sniffed and wiped his eyes as Gerard kneeled infront of him.

"But you use to take it as gel, didn't you? Can't you go back?"

"It breaks me out in rashes and I get acne. I just..Its my fault. I knew I had to go back but I just..I felt like me. For once I had everything happening the way its suppose to."

"Hey, you'll be okay. I'll be here, okay? You can nip me everytime you're mad at the world." Gerard joked, reaching up to wipe Franks tears away.

"You're my boy, okay? No matter what." Frank sobbed harder, pushing himself forward into Gerards arms. He hugged back just as tight, closing his eyes as he shushed him quietly.

"You'll be okay."

-

Franks mood swings started six days later, to the point Gerard couldn't be in the same room as him. He knew it wasn't his fault, Frank was going through withdrawls. He always waited until Frank was asleep until he crawled into bed beside him. He woke up on day 9 to the most horrifying scream he had ever heard, Frank was sitting up sobbing beside him, hands gripping the duvet as he cried.

"Baby? Baby what happened?"

"I'm bleeding!" He sobbed, pushing back the blankets to let Gerard know what the fuck he meant. Gerard shushed him immediatly, pulling Frank onto his lap.

"Shush. I'm here, Frank. Calm down." Gerard whispered, holding Frank as he tried to pull away. 

"Let go!"

"No!" Gerard snapped, making Frank dissolve into his arms. They didn't move until Frank threw up from withdrawls, then Gerard carried him into the shower and got in with him fully clothed as he turned on the water.

"You will be okay. I promise." Frank shook his head as he sat down, tear stained and eyes blood shot.

"I'm phoning the doctors. Fuck this." Gerard whispered and got out. He lit a cigarette as he fumbled with Franks phone, barely giving the receptionist time to answer before he spoke.

"I need a doctors appointment today."

"I can fit you in on the 26th-"

"If I don't get one today, I will sit outside the office and tell fucking everybody how your letting a man go through fucking withdrawls with nothing! He can't eat or sleep, he's fucking throwing up and suicidal. You get me a fucking appointment." Gerard growled and listened to her gasps. Gerard could do a lot worse than that. 

"Now!" He shouted and hung up as soon as she told him to come right in. 

-

"You're my saviour." Frank mumbled as he hugged a hot water bottle against his chest. Gerard kissed his shoulder and relaxed against the back of the couch, feeling Frank relax into him. 

"I should have phoned days ago. I'm sorry you had to go through that." 

"I'll be okay in a day or two. He gave me a stronger dose so be prepared for a horny Frank."

"Totally prepared." Gerard mumbled into his shoulder, glad to have  _his_ Frank back. 

"How's the writing going?"

"I'm up until now so i'm not sure what to write. I guess I have to include this and stuff."

"Is it uh..gonna talk about sex?"

"Yeah. That okay? It's not going to have our real names." Frank looked back at him as Gerard nodded. Who was Gerard to say no?

"I think it'll help trans kids. Like..I never pictured finding anyone to want me. I fell in love in my books, I didn't think it would really happen to me. Especially not you. I just thought you would prefare a dude with a dick."

"You have one, dickbag."

"Not one I can use on you." Frank admitted as Gerard kissed his forehead gently.

"Toys are magical things, babe." 

"You'd want that? That would be pretty cool." Frank blushed into his lap, making Gerard grin. 

"Anything with you is pretty cool. How are you feeling?"

"Stomach hurts." Frank whispered and closed his eyes, ending the conversation silently.

-

Frank was glued to his laptop, lips parted as Gerard walked onto the kitchen. He watched him type for a while, wondering what he was even writing only for Frank to slam the laptop shut as soon as Gerard came near.

"Um..was that porn?"

"Smut. But yeah, anyway I ah..I ordered us a toy."

"Without my help?" Gerard frowned as Frank shrugged. 

"You'll like it. Whats for dinner?"

"Pizza. Take your vitamins?"

"Yeah. So we aren't cooking?"

"Is that okay?" Gerard frowned. Frank never cared if they cooked. He nodded and tugged Gerard in, closing the gap between their lips.

"It's totally kicked in hasn't it?" Gerard laughed as Frank kissed down his neck. He hummed happily and undid Gerards pants right as the door opened.

"Fuck." Frank whined as Gerard did up his pants just as Mikey came in. 

"Hey, guys. Who wants to go out?" 

"Definatly. Gotta eat first." Frank hummed and leaned back to kiss Gerards cheek. 

"No wine."

"Deal." Frank winked and pushed himself up, Gerard wrapped an arm around his waist and tugged him in for a soft kiss.

"Hold that thought?"

"Hmm. Counting on it."

 -

Frank barely waited until Mikey shut Franks old rooms door before he pushed Gerard into the wall, lips attacting to his neck immediatly. Gerard closed his eyes and tried to hold in his moans as Frank lifted him up easily, holding him against the wall. 

"So fucking gorgeous, Gee." He mumbled as he carried him into the room. Gerard could totally get use to being carried, he didn't get long to enjoy it as Frank lay him on the bed and went for his belt buckle. 

"Me first." Gerard tugged Frank up, kissing him roughly as he turned them over and undid Franks jeans, shoving at them until he could kick them off. He broke the kiss to bite at Franks neck as he pushed down his boxers. 

"Gee?"

"S'okay. You're okay, right?"

"Right." Frank whispered, voice trembling when Gerard slid down the bed. He spent a lot of time leaving teeth marks over Franks stomach before finally moving between his thighs. Frank was hard, standing tall when he spread his legs as Gerard kissed at his thighs. He glanced up to make sure Frank was okay before trailing his tongue over the head, tasting Franks juices. He smirked as Frank bucked his hips before sucking him in gently, treating it as a normal penis as he started bobbing his head slowly.

"God, yes!" He hummed around his member, trailing a finger over the sensitive skin as Frank arched up and whimpered. He ran his finger over his hole, wet and warm and listened to Franks sharp intake of breath. 

"Please. There, c'mon." Frank begged and arched into the touch, he slid a finger in slowly, feeling the muscle adjust to him as he pulled off to breath against Franks thigh.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, more." Frank panted, he watched the second finger join the first and bit back a moan of his own. He sucked Frank down again, arching his fingers as he began to move them quickly, listening to the loud moans escaping Frank lips. He could tell Frank was close, pulling off to lick at the head until Frank  _screamed_ and came over the sheets. Gerard licked him clean, slowly removing his fingers before wrapping them around his own length, cumming over Franks thigh within a few strokes. He licked his own cum of the skin before moving to kiss Frank sleepily.

"So fucking hot babe." 

"You are amazing." Frank mumbled as he cuddled in against Gerards chest. He wanted to argue that  _Frank was the amazing one_ but his eyes grew heavy, sending him asleep in seconds.

He woke up hungover as hell, sleepily pulling on some pyjama pants as he went into the kitchen to find Frank typing as he sipped his coffee. He glanced in at Mikey hugging a bin to his chest before kissing Franks shoulder and let his eyes wonder over the words appearing.  _He makes me feel like me. Like the man I was always suppose to be._

"Cause you've always been that man to me." Gerard promised, making Frank grin widely. 

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." Gerard whispered and watched Frank scroll up the page.

"You have a lot of porn to read."

"Oh yeah? Last night already wrote?"

"Hmm. Defiantly." Frank started typing again as Gerard squeezed his hip and headed into the living room to ruffle Mikeys hair.

"You and Ray fighting?"

"Yeah." Mikey leaned into his side and sighed loudly. 

-

"Here." Frank thrust a thick booklet of papers towards him and sat on the coffee table to bite his thumb nail.

"It's the first eight chapters."

"Babe. I trust you. I can wait until its finished."

"Gee..my tutor wants to forward it to a publisher. I need you to okay it."

"This is me okaying it." Gerard held the papers out, grinning as Frank ran his fingers over the front.

"Are you sure?"

"Completely. I trust you babe." 

-

6 months later and Frank held out a hard back book. He took it and glanced over the cover, chewing his lip as he tried not to sob. 

_How I fell in love by Frank A Iero._

"The real one is getting designed. I just..I want you to read it before it's released. I want you to know how much you mean to me, even if I can't tell you properly. I can tell you on paper." Frank whispered quietly and leaned down to kiss Gerards head, he paused there, letting out a shakey breath.

"Are you nervous?"

"You're seeing everything from my point of view. Every fight, every struggle, every mindblowing orgasm." Frank chuckled and kissed his forehead again.

"Don't skip ahead. The names changed in the others, but this is yours."

"You got it." Gerard promised and watched Frank leave. He opened the book and grinned at the front page.

_G, thank you for saving me. Thank you for making life worth living. Until my last breath, I am yours xoF_

Gerard opened to the proper front page and curled towards the book.

_Before I tell you the love story, let me take you back to where it all began. This isn't a happy part of the story but it's a part nonetheless. I was ten years old when I first thought there was something wrong with me. I was the black sheep, the abnormal one who insisted on playing with trucks and cars instead of dolls or prams. I first shaved my head when I was eleven, with my fathers old shaver he had left out. In reply to my newly terrible haircut, I got a slap across the face. Thankfully, that was the last time I seen my father. My mother informed my that I wasn't broken that night, after trying to fix the terrible hair cut. She made me cookies and acted normally as she informed me that there was infact people just like me. I wasn't sick or abnormal. I was just me. I'll always be thankful for that._

_When I was 14, I moved 20 miles east and joined Newark high as Frank instead of Franchesca. I felt liberated, proudly wearing a pride flag on my bag. Other people sadly didn't agree with it. Let's call him Tom, he was tall and scary when I felt so small and helpless, throwing insults as he towered over me. I don't hate him, without him there wouldn't be a story to tell. The first time I met the man I fell in love with was that day, he defended me to Tom and got me out of there, away from the people who just wanted to laugh. Gerard Arthur Way, you changed my life that day. You taught me that being a man wasn't about anything other than your actions. It wasn't defined about what was down your pants nor was it defined by your name. That will always stay with me, every decision I make is based on that one. You could have laughed with everyone else or just walked on to class. But you didn't. You saved me._

_This isn't where the love story starts, not really, although I think if we didn't have the struggles you're about to read about, we wouldn't be the men we are today._

_-_

Gerard couldn't put the book down. It was incredible how passionitly Frank wrote, how he explained things in the perfect amount of detail.

_I first realised I was in love when Gerard moved to college. I thought I was overreacting, comparing my sadness to his brother who kept telling me that he'll be home at the weekend. The weekend always felt to far for me. On a Wednesday in late September, I remember climbing onto the 1 am train and sobbing until Gerard met me at the station. He never questions me, even to this day he still doesn't. I use to wonder if I was bothering him, especially when he got into a new relationship and I insisted I tagged along on their dates. I moved in with him a year later and hid my feelings in my writing. All I could write was romances, the main characters always based of us. I use to struggle to say their names instead of ours when I'd read them to him. He never noticed. Gerard loves reading, zooning out and painting the images in his head. I always focus on him as I read, memorising the words so I could watch the emotions pass over his features._

_-_

_He brought me home from the hospital and wouldn't leave my side. He was surviving of cigarettes and caffine, eyes exhausted when I finally convinced him to climb in beside me. I'll never forget his eyes when he whispered 'I could have lost you.' My heart ached in my chest at the pain across them. The kiss, just like Gerard himself, was breathtakingly beautiful. It was slow and gentle, everything the romantic in me could ever want. The next morning, when he stumbled for a shower, I watched him go. I didn't know how to react. Was it like my storys? Was I suppose to go in there and climb in behind him? Was I suppose to let him leave without a kiss? Who knew? Defiantly not me. Instead, I somehow found the courage to go into the bathroom and stare at the shower curtain as I stuttered out whatever came to mind. Somehow my brain thought 'I shouldn't have kissed you,' was a good idea. It wasn't. It broke his heart as he hummed brokengly. Its true though, whenever I pictured our first kiss, it wasn't in a bed with Carebear covers, nor were we suppose to be tear stained and snot covered. Thinking back on it now, I wouldn't change it even if I had a thousand do overs. Every good night kiss we share takes me back to that time. It's always my favourite kiss off the day._

_-_

_Writing smut was always my weakness. What could a virgin write about sex? Was sex even like that in books? Did people just magically do it and be completely normal afterwards? The answer to those questions is no. Sex wasn't like what it is in movies or books. To me, it was the most horifying thing I ever did. We were drunk, the laptop abandoned onto the floor after he caught me writing smut. We were kissing and I let myself give in and ignore the pouding in my chest. He broke away first, dark eyes and wet lips, needing something, anything. So I did exactly what I do best, I closed my eyes and told Gerard exactly what i'd write. I let my mind focus on the words rather than the act infront of me. In turn, my actions grew more confident, I was able to pin his hand down, make him beg for me. The moment he came, I remember the absaloute shock that came over my body. This beautiful man infront of me was in pleasure because of me. I wanted to run at that minute, knowing what comes after. Could I let him touch me? Would he be disgusted? What if I wasn't enough for him? I let him in that night, hiding my eyes to covers the tears as he explored my body. I didn't sleep, how could I?, I slid out from his arms and sat in the bathroom as I sobbed into my knees. What if he doesn't want me anymore? Don't get me wrong, I knew deep down Gerard wouldn't leave me for something so minimal as not having a penis. He knew all along. But what would he think about an enlarged clitoris from the Testosterone? Would that be the worst thing he ever had to do? I didn't sleep that night at all, I sat on the living room floor and watched him sleep. Would he care if I left? It kept circling my head that I could just leave. It wouldn't hurt so much if I left, right? I couldn't look at him the next morning, waiting for him to break up with me. Ofcourse thats not what happened or this would be a terrible love story. Instead, he followed me into the kitchen and made me look at him, he asked me if we were okay with a soft kiss before complaining he was hungry. How was he acting so normal? Was this what a loving relationship felt like?_

Gerard was sobbing when Frank walked in with the groceries, causing him to pause and frown.

"You don't like it? Thats okay, i'll call the publish-"

"You were in so much pain. Frankie, you should have told me. You should have came to me for help!"

"I didn't need to. Not really. Read on my love."

_When he fell asleep that night, after an amazing day of extra stares and kisses, I stood infront of the mirror and pictured what he was seeing. I wasn't the transgender kid to Gerard, I never was. I closed my eyes and felt my body, stopping myself from referring to my penis as a clit. That's not what it was anymore. It was mine, I had a penis between my legs no matter what size or how it came about. My problems didn't magiclly disappear at the revelation, but I didn't have to hide from Gerard. I got into bed that night feeling a weight of my chest. I changed infront of Gerard the following morning and got a soft kiss in return._

_-_

_The first time we actually made love, I felt more like a man then than in my entire life. I held Gerard up against the wall, letting him claw at my shoulders as I finally pushed into him, feeling his body shake in my hands will always be my favourite thing. We both cried afterwards, emotions overwelming as I finally wasn't a virgin anymore. We make love against the wall allot these days and he never mentions it, I think he knows its when I feel best about myself, holding my entire world in my arms._

_-_

"You seriously have two pages left? Have you moved the past two days?" Frank laughed and threw himself onto the couch. Gerard abandoned the book to tackle him back onto the couch and cover his face in kisses.

"I know I don't say it much, but I love you more than anything." Gerard whispered, leaning into the hand on his jaw.

"I know, baby. I love you too." Frank kissed him softly and pushed the hair behind his ear.

"Finish it off, baby." Frank whispered, sitting up and spreading his legs for Gerard to sit in between. He lay back, resting his back against Franks chest and relaxing into the arms around his shoulders. 

_To conclude this story, I want to admit that while we defiantly still have our fights, I know the man by my side will be there forever, watching me work out and stopping me from getting into fights. He'll deal with my temper or my mood swings because thats what partners do. They stand by eachother, through thick and thin._

_To all the people reading this, love is the most magically thing to ever come across, no matter what your gender or sexuality is, you will find it. You will find someone who wakes you up with pancakes and who brings you white roses just because they can. You are good enough for love._

_To Gerard, my sweet boy. You make me feel good enough. I'll forever be thankful for everything you do for me. Our love has grew from a tiny seed planted 10 years ago until..._

Gerard turned to the last page and swallowed the lump in his throat at the image stuck onto the page.

_Two became three!_


End file.
